{"product_id":"perimenopause-advent-calenda2","title":"Perimenopause Advent Calendar","description":"\u003ch1 data-pm-slice=\"1 1 []\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerimenopause Advent Calendar – 24 Days of Feminist Rage, Laughs \u0026amp; Little Surprises\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHot flashes. Brain fog. Zero patience. Absolutely no fucks left to give.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWelcome to perimenopause! That magical time of life when your hormones are doing whatever the hell they want, your internal thermostat has lost its mind, and your tolerance for bullshit has reached an all-time low.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOur \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e24-Day Perimenopause Advent Calendar\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e is here to help you laugh your way through the chaos with a daily dose of humor, nostalgia, feminist rage, and a little self-love.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBehind each of the 24 days is a fun little surprise chosen to celebrate women who have reached the glorious stage of life where they're no longer interested in making themselves smaller to keep everyone else comfortable.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhat's Inside?\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou'll discover a fabulous assortment of goodies, including:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-spread=\"false\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSassy magnets with sayings like \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerimenopause: 0 Stars\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFresh Out of Fucks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, and \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIn My Absolutely Not Era\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHilarious, nostalgic, and unapologetically feminist stickers\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThree enamel pins celebrating nostalgia, empowerment, and your inner child\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBeautiful gemstone jewelry, including an amethyst necklace and lepidolite bracelet\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRose quartz and obsidian gemstone hearts\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA special rage necklace for Day 24\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA decision coin for those days when you simply cannot make one more decision\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA little bell for ringing away the negative energy\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA colorful suncatcher, funky paperclips, a nostalgic keytag, and scratch-and-sniff stickers\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePlus, a 24-Day Companion Booklet!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEvery day includes a description of your surprise, a fascinating fact about women's bodies, health, history, or science, and an empowering quote from a remarkable woman.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou'll learn some surprising things, have a few laughs, and hopefully feel a little more connected to the millions of women navigating this wonderfully ridiculous chapter of life.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA Little Warning (Because We're Not Here to Be Subtle)\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis calendar contains swear words, feminist opinions, and a healthy amount of hatred for the patriarchy.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou'll find phrases like \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFuck the Patriarchy\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFresh Out of Fucks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, and \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFueled by Coffee \u0026amp; Feminist Rage\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIf you're easily offended by strong language, outspoken women, or the suggestion that the patriarchy can fuck right off, this probably isn't the calendar for you.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBut if you believe aging is a privilege, women's voices deserve to be heard, and sometimes laughter is the best way to deal with hormonal chaos, you're going to love it.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYourself, your best friend, your sister, or any woman navigating perimenopause, menopause, or the general exhaustion of being a woman in a world that expects us to smile through everything.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e24 days. 24 surprises. Zero apologies.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause we're not getting older. We're getting more interesting.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnd we're definitely not getting quieter.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Bird And Bear Bath","offers":[{"title":"Blue Retro Sun","offer_id":67504325558513,"sku":null,"price":125.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gold Sun","offer_id":67504336077041,"sku":null,"price":125.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Retro Print","offer_id":67504336109809,"sku":null,"price":125.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Crows","offer_id":67504336142577,"sku":null,"price":125.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0013\/3854\/0089\/files\/listingcover2.png?v=1794448019","url":"https:\/\/birdandbearshop.com\/products\/perimenopause-advent-calenda2","provider":"Bird And Bear Shop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}